Share Your World 2016 – Week 42

The Saint 1997
image from The Saint 1997

It’s Friday! I am not really excited by this, more surprised. It’s Friday and I’m still not fully awake. My knees still ache, I can barely lift my arms (except to get food into my mouth). The internet in my house keeps going down and when it is working my son is on the computer playing Roblox. So here I am playing catch up on my iphone at Panera’s at 8:30 in the morning on a Friday. Finally getting around to answering the questions from Share Your World for this week with questions provided by Chris, from 61 Musings.

If you wanted to de-clutter where you live, what room / space would you start with? (And why, if you’re feel like admitting to it.)

I am in a constant state of decluttering. It seems everytime I conquer a pile of papers, I turn around and my son has left a trail of socks.

If you want to remember something important, how do you do it (sticky note on the fridge, string around your finger, etc.), and does it work?

How do you do it?  That is the question! Mostly I don’t. My ADDled brain has a hard time remembering things or keeping them in order. I may remember I have a doctors appointment on Tuesday and as I’m walking out the door realize it is next Tuesday – or was it last Tuesday, oh, no today isn’t Tuesday it’s Friday! Silly me. I am big on sticky notes. They are everywhere. On the fridge, the calendar, door, lampshade, forehead. I also try to set up reminders on my iphone. That is really helpful, as long as I remember to set them up.

If you could create a one room retreat just for yourself, what would be the most important sense to emphasize: sight (bright natural light, dim light, etc.), hearing (silence, music, fountain, etc.), smell (candles, incense, etc), touch (wood, stone, soft fabrics, etc.), or taste (herbal tea, fresh fruit, etc.)?

A lock – it would need a lock. Beyond that, I am very sensual. This is why I hate online shopping: I like to see, touch, feel and smell what I am buying. Although sometimes I do get sensory overload. Because of what I can only guess is anxiety I like to sit next to windows or along the aisles. I had a class in college once where I would come into the room after walking a mile and a half from the office feeling refreshed and happy. I would take my seat next the window which was open because the building was old and didn’t have ac. After 90 minutes of focusing on the Professor, listening to my fellow classmates, the loud busses and noisy traffic and voices of various passerby coming through the window from Lexington Avenue, I would leave irritated and grumpy. It took me almost all semester to realize what the problem was. On the otherhand, I can’t sleep if it’s too quiet!

So I would need windows I can open to let the sun shine in the room, but light curtains to block it out if too bright or too gloomy outside. A fan to circulate the air and create white noise, candles or incense with lavender or sandalwood, the walls painted sage green or butterscotch, hardwood floors with bolster pillows and a wool blanket for when I get a chill, which I often do, water to drink and this tea we’d drink after dahn hak. Its a korean blend of juju beans, bark and other things I’m not sure of.

If you could interview one of your great-great-great grandparents, who would it be (if you know their name) and what would you ask?

This is a tough one. I barely new my grandparents. I met my father’s parents twice in my lifetime, when I was 11 and 14, when we visited them in Rome, Italy for a few weeks. I don’t speak Italian and they didn’t speak English so communication was limited. My mother’s mother died when she was a girl and her father had moved back to Italy and died there when I was a small child. I never met him. So as my grandparents were a mystery to me, I’ve never really thought back that far. I’d just like to interview my grandmothers. My mother’s mother Serafina to ask what it was like to be sent overseas to America to be her cousin’s wife? Did she want to go? How did she cope when she got there?  What was it like growing up in Corato, Bari and how different was it from Manhatten? What was it like raising four children through the depression? Was she worried when her only son went to fight in WWII? Did she know she was sick? Did she suffer much? Was there any history of her illness in the family before and what exactly was it?

Then there’s my father’s mother, Luisa. I’d ask her if she had wanted to get married when she did. Was it arranged or a marriage of love? What were her expectations and how did they change when her husband bought his two sons from a previous marriage home for her to care for? What was it like raising seven kids during WWII. What about losing her babies? How did it feel when she was hit with the shrapnel and living with it lodged in her leg her whole life? Did she miss my father very much when he left for America? What did she know about me and my siblings? How did she become such an excellent cook?

Of course, I don’t expect them to spill their true feelings that’s not what women of their generation do and Italians, at least my family, don’t like to talk of struggles. So I am sure it would go something like this: It’s how it was, you make do with what god gives you.

Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up? 

I am grateful that I am breathing, I have food to eat, a home for shelter and money to spend and for my family and my cats. I am looking forward to getting some sleep and getting some energy back.


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