Last week I wrote about my lack of willpower and the donettes. I don’t really care that I ate the donuts, what I care about is why did I eat the donuts? As I said: when I am working, pondering, thinking through my thoughts, and making connections, and putting pieces together – I want to eat. I just want to snack on what ever is readily available and won’t make a mess or need any preparation or much clean up.
Most likely, I created a habit. Perhaps back in my school days. I need to break the habit.
The theme this week at Weight Watchers was all about setting up a positive chain reaction. It’s basically a flow chart which lists the steps needed to ensure a good outcome. A weak link can break the chain and lead to mishaps. My life is full of these – I wake up late, I forget the item on the counter at home, something more tempting comes along, I lose track of time and so on…
Take travelling, for example, every time we travel we end up stopping in a rest area and eating junk. Once, I packed a healthy lunch and snacks. When we stopped at the rest area to use the bathrooms, the intention was to have a nice picnic. But Mr. Obscure and I just looked at each other and went for Roy Rogers and ice cream. There is just something about travelling that makes junk food appealing.
Weight Watchers suggests I follow the behavior chain backward to uncover the weak link or the action that led me away from the outcome I expected. I tried that for the donette incident:
start: made a healthy lunch – 1. ate a healthy, balanced lunch – 2. Went to pickup son from school –3. two hours after eating lunch, started blog post and wanted a snack – 4. thought about donettes – 5. thought about it and realized I wasn’t hungry and continued writing – 6. walked over and picked up donettes – 7. blogged and ate donettes.
Hmmm, that didn’t quite work. There seems to be a missing link. What happened between steps 5 and 6? Am I the weak link?
I have done all of this before – flow charts, lists, set multiple alarms, set up reminders on my iphone, added everything to my calendar, post-it notes everywhere, affirmations, meditation…
I’ve done it all and still my ADDled brain does what it wants and I haven’t a clue. It’s like if someone asks me my favorite color or my favorite song, off the top of my head I haven’t a clue. You could ask me a question now and I wouldn’t have an answer until Friday at 11:00 pm. A friend once asked me on a Tuesday where I went to dinner that proceeding Friday. I had posted it to facebook. I couldn’t recall and had to look up the facebook post to jog my memory.
It’s a fun ride folks and I’m just settling in and learning how to have fun on it.
On another note, something strange happened as a result of reading the book by Marie Kondo, The life-changing magic of tidying up: the Japanese art of decluttering and organizing. Our house is on the market and I had a friend come by to give me some ideas on how to “stage it.” I hate that, I don’t watch any of those TV shows, and when I go and see a house that is staged, I just feel that it is soul-less. On her advice, I moved the trundle bed which I knew was in a precarious state and was planning on discarding when we move. It survived the move across the room and the removal of the back panel which was broken. Yet, when I threw the comforter on top, the bed broke. This is the strange part – I began talking to the house. No, it did not talk back to me, but I did feel more relaxed after our conversation.
images from giphy.com